The Single Most Important Quality In A Partner

The Single Most Important Quality In A Partner

The single most important quality in a partner? Can you guess it?


A growth mindset.


This is hands down the most important quality to look for in a partner – with it, you can get through anything. Without it, you’ll be frustrated and at the danger of sounding overly dramatic (admittedly not the first time in my life), you risk living a very forgettable life.


When you stop growing, you stop living to your fullest potential.


If you reflect on your past relationships and why they ended, you are likely to find at the core of your issues an unwillingness to grow on either of your parts.


It’s only natural for us to grow, expand, and evolve – such is the rhythm of the Universe. That’s why it feels so uncomfortable when you or the people you share your life with stop growing – it is unnatural.

Questions you’ve struggled with in the past, such as does it matter that he doesn’t make that much money? Is it ok that he’s not as spiritual as I am? What about the fact that I travel more than he does, is that a problem?


All of these “issues” can evolve if he has a growth mindset.


Ambition + drive > money
Willingness to learn about one’s self > than an existing spiritual practice
Curiosity and adventurous spirit > stamps on a passport

So how do you know if you’re with someone with a growth mindset? Here are a few clues:

  1. They’re willing to have uncomfortable conversations.
  2. They like to try new things.
  3. They’re into personal development or at least a little curious about what you’re learning in your own personal development.
  4. They think outside the box.
  5. They have goals and life visions.
  6. They’re open-minded and willing to consider different perspectives.
  7. They’re curious about people and life.
  8. They like learning!
  9. They’re willing to consider the possibility that they’re not right.
  10. They focus more on what they can do rather than what they can’t. 

Now before you take this list and hold it up in comparison to your new beau, examine your own areas of potential inside of this list.


Do you often see yourself as right? Do you judge others for not “growing” as much as you are? Do you often sit on a spiritual high horse?


If you can answer yes to any of these questions in the slightest way, you’ve got your own growing to do, girl.


You can’t force growth on someone, in fact, the more you do this, the more they resist.


What you can do is pursue your own growth and possibly inspire him to pursue his.

When he sees all the ways you are rising, he’s either going to rise up with you or fall so far behind he’ll no longer be part of the picture.


With love,

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