Relationships Don

Relationships Don’t Need Work – Here’s What They Need Instead

Money doesn’t grow on trees. Opposites attract. Relationships need work.

We’re all guilty of repeating sound bites that we’ve heard from parents, friends, movies, and endless outside influences. We mindlessly utter these words with little regard for how they’re impacting our beliefs, and ultimately, our lives.

For most of us the word “work” comes with a lot of baggage; and not the beautiful fancy kind that makes us excited. So if adding more “work” to your life doesn’t sound appealing, allow me to reframe this statement in a way you can actually inspired by: 

Relationships thrive with your loving attention.

Doesn’t this feel so much better? Hallelujah, no more work please!

Paying loving attention to your relationship requires you to check in with your partner. Are their needs being met? How are they feeling (in all areas of their life)? Are they getting enough alone time? Enough you time?

By bringing curiosity to the relationship with your partner, you open things up for a lot of discovery. Ask fun, spontaneous, out of the box questions, spend a little time together in the mornings before you dash out for the day, hug a little longer. Pay attention to the little sneaky ways your connection is fading: like having your phone out when you’re together, or not fully listening when they’re speaking.

Loving attention also asks that you check in with yourself. Are you being reasonable with your expectations? What patterns are you slipping into that may not serve your ultimate relationship vision? Are you having fun? Are you taking enough time for yourself? What do you need right now?

While “work” makes it sound like you need to do some hard grinding, attention means just that, paying attention – to yourself, your partner and your relationship. It should feel like curiosity and wonder!

So, the next time you catch yourself repeating something you’ve never given much thought to, ask yourself, “is this something I like believing?” If not, choose to reframe it in a way that gives you all the good kind of feels.

Peace & love,

Diana X

P.S. If you’re ready to ditch what you know about relationships being hard work and start enjoying creating the love you want and deserve, let’s talk 🙂

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