Why You Enter Panic Mode When You Spot A Red Flag

Why You Enter Panic Mode When You Spot A Red Flag

You meet a guy, the chemistry is right, he checks all your boxes and you inevitably start to feel shook. The possibilities, the unknowns, the anticipation…it’s hot and very bewildering.

Then a couple of weeks go by and things start to surface that you less than appreciate. Like when you caught him sizing up the waitresses at that swanky restaurant.

At this point, you’re not entirely sure if it’s your insecurity rearing its ugly head, or a red flag.

Instead of relaxing back to observe, stay present and open to all the answers that will reveal themselves with sweet time, you go into overdrive.

You think about him when you should be working, question every word he’s ever said and you definitely regret sleeping with him so soon.

Because now you’re in…and deep.

So you devise plans, write and rewrite text messages a dozen times and finally, decide to frantically call him in the middle of his work day only to be received by an awkward…. “Hello…?”

You know this situation well. But what you might not know is why you do it.

There’s a part of you that does this because you’re afraid that if time goes by and you discover he isn’t the one, you won’t have the strength to walk away.

But you will.

You need to trust in yourself and your ability to remake your decisions.

And in the meantime, your only job is to quiet your fretful mind enough to hear the wisdom of your inner truth – and his – which are both speaking to you loud and clear.

You need to continuously remind yourself that you have time…time to be present with him, time to get to know him and time to spend in silent meditation to hear your truth.

A red flag doesn’t always mean the end of the road; it does mean you need to be a lot more aware, a lot more in tune, and a lot more in trust of yourself.

Like when I were first dating and he would say things like “I’ll never get married”…. “If I do get married, it’ll be in a long time from now.”

For most, this would be a cause for panic. For me, I got more present.

And in case you don’t know how this story goes, Jack and I have been happily married for the last three years and now have a gorgeous 20 month old boy together.

So if you’re curious how you can date with dignity – in a way that moves you from casual to committed, I invite you to get in touch – because I’m cooking up something real special for you.

With love,


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